Lance, lies and litigation

Can I stop writing about this now? Can I please stop writing about it?

Although the media attention is heightening, we’re getting diminishing returns from the Lance Armstrong doping story now. He appeared on Oprah and said some stuff, but the whole of it can be neatly packaged away in one box thanks to one, simple fact, expressed best by the man himself:

“I’m not the most believable guy in the world right now.”

No, you’re really not. The picture was clearer when 90 per cent of what you said was complete bullshit. At least then we knew roughly where we stood. Now you’re telling a bit more of the truth, but we don’t know whether we’re getting 20 per cent bullshit or 60 per cent bullshit. Why should any of us have to expend any energy working out what is and isn’t the true story?

In the Oprah interview, he kept talking about being ‘flawed’, but flaws are what you find on something that is otherwise sound. They are imperfections and are only recognisable as such in reference to perfection itself.  Lance Armstrong simply has too many bad qualities to be considered flawed – the bullying, harassment and intimadatory litigation are bigger crimes than the doping itself in my eyes, although it’s all wrapped up together, really.

Armstrong is basically a pretty bad person who happens to also have some inspirational qualities. It’s an odd and fascinating mix and this will probably see him continuing to thrive in some warped form or other for years to come.


Comments

5 responses to “Lance, lies and litigation”

  1. At least he had the ball to finally confess.

    Not my joke, but I like it.

    Generally though, who gives a shit what the man says or does? Anyone who takes any interest in cycling has been convinced he was doping for years (except Phil Liggett, but he’s a moron). Don’t know who his audience was. He’s just a washed up old cheat, shortly due to lose most of his money as he gets sued by everyone he defrauded of money. I hope he ends up in the clink.

    1. I personally don’t care, but I suppose some poor sod has to listen and pick apart the truth from the lies.

      For example, Armstrong denies doping after his 2009 comeback. If this is true and he makes a deal in which he tells on his mates, he could potentially get away with an eight-year ban. This scenario would have his last offence in 2005 and could therefore see him compete in triathlons later this year.

      Everything’s got an angle. He’s such a knob.

  2. A MASSIVE manipulative knob.

    This is such a non story as well all know the truth……,,but no one can’t stop reading/writing about it as there just won’t be a satisfactory conclusion until he admits it all under oath and is cross examined.

    It’s infuriating and I’m not sure how someone like Bassons or Simeoni hasn’t gone after him with a large hammer. I reckon Kimmage might be close to cracking now though…..

    1. Paul Kimmage is a man you do not want to inadvertently upset. You never know what’ll finally tip the balance. Inadvertently short-change him or accidentally step on the back of his shoe and he’s liable to GO ABSOLUTELY APE SHIT.

      The Lance Armstrong doping story is a non-story, but there are a good few stories within it. It’s not a mainstream story, but if you care about cycling and how it’s run, there’s plenty more going on.

  3. Very true, I think that’s the most frustrating bit, there are so many tales and intrigues, we just want to know how all the pieces fit together and find out; who actually did what, what is linked to who, and who knew about it and did nothing/looked the other way for a bag of readies or to ‘respect the Omertà’

    Team Sky must be sending Kimmage those toy lions that Wiggins won in the TDF. They always need signed for, he’s never in and he has to collect them from the sorting office every Saturday after queuing for half an hour hoping its that stress ball he’s ordered, not another toy lion. As he’s getting seriously pissy with them at the moment.

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